Tuesday, December 6, 2011

I had a dream last night

Immediately after I learn that someone I love has died, I have this super neat habit of dreaming that they are dead, or I am watching them die. The first weeks are awful, and sleep comes in fits. And then, about three months in something miraculous happens, the dreams change. These dreams become glorious moments that I have with the person I have lost. In my dream last night I was at a big family function inside some unfamiliar home when my grandfather (who died about 2 1/2 years ago) walks in, he looks at me and says "there's my girl" I give him a big, big hug and I say "I am so glad you are here, I love you" and he says he loves me too.  Then my cat woke me up. At my internship we talk A LOT about Freud and I know he would have a lot to say about this dream, but I don't care.  I do not have these dreams every night, but when I do all I can say is that they are a gift and I wake up feeling a little more loved. My faith tells me that when we die and leave this earth, we do not end and these dreams are confirmation.  The subjects of these dreams are usually my grandmother and grandfather and their touches are so real in my dreams, that I know I am not alone.